Postal
Release Date:
October 12, 2007
On the Big Board |
| Position |
Staff |
In Brief |
| 193/196 |
Max Braden |
You have to have a weird sense of humor to find this funny, and I didn't. Oh, what a coincidence, it's Uwe Boll. |
The not-so-revered Uwe Boll went wild in June 2006. At that time, the director's production company issued a press release stating that Boll would go toe-to-toe in five separate boxing matches against his harshest critics. Three months later, Boll fought and won against five of his biggest haters, including Ain't it Cool News writer Jeff Sneider and Rue Morgue magazine writer Chris Alexander.
Sounds mad. But then again, why not? Time and time again, the critics hate his work (literally). His latest films — with Boll at the helm as director — are remakes of horror video games, including House of the Dead in 2003, Alone in the Dark in 2005 and BloodRayne in 2006. Critically and financially, the three flatlined. House of the Dead earned $10,199,354 and was liked by just 4% of critics, according to Rotten Tomatoes. BloodRayne, starring Ben Kingsley, Michelle Rodriguez and, sadly, Meatloaf, grossed just $2,405,420. Again, it was liked by 4% of critics.
But the granddaddy of them all is Alone in the Dark. Though it earned a bit more than BloodRayne at a still unimpressive $5,178,569, just one critic — out of 114 — gave the Christian Slater/Tara Reid project a positive review. (Shame on you, Eclipse Magazine’s Michelle Alexandria!)
Taking a break from the horror genre — though Bloodrayne II: Deliverance, Bloodrayne 3: Warhammer and Alone in the Dark II are shamefully in the works — Boll's next feature is the crude comedy Postal, based on the 1997 shoot 'em up videogame of the same name.
The film, which aims to push the envelope on political, moral and social correctness — a la South Park — stars Zack Ward as Dude, an unemployed lowlife who is one day inspired to get his life back on track. So, he gets involved in a criminal scheme with his uncle Dave (Dave Foley), which calls for stealing and reselling OKrotch-y Dolls, a must-have kids toy. (Think Tickle Me Elmo in 1996 and Furby in 1998).
Outside of Foley and Verne Troyer, who cameos as himself, Postal's cast is filled with unknowns. This doesn't mean, however, that audiences will be unfamiliar with some of the lead characters, including comedic portrayals of Osama bin Laden and George W. Bush. Other characters include Azeem, Cooter and Retarded Taliban.
Either way, something tells me those unprecedented boxing matches will do little to increase Postal's number of positive reviews. (Eric Hughes/BOP)
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