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I find it hard to believe that this early '80s Journey music video is getting a theatrical release. I mean, are we that hard up for nostalgia that all we really have left is to make fun of Steve Perry's pink and black tanktop and the band playing non-existent instruments? And why this song? There are other songs by them that....

...oh, that's "Separate Ways." Sorry.

The considerably less interesting Severed Ways: The Norse Discovery of America will be distributed by Heathen Films in what we're going to assume is an extremely limited release.

Written by, produced by, directed by and starring nobody that you've heard of (in fact, this is the first IMDb credit for nearly everyone involved), Severed Ways takes place in the 11th century, the year 1007, to be exact. All we can glean from the limited plot description is that a Viking expedition lands in what would be America. Exploring the land, the party is attacked and left for dead. There are two survivors and each takes a different path to survival in an unfamiliar land.

The Journey video sounds more interesting, honestly. (Tim Briody/BOP)

Vital statistics for Severed Ways: The Norse Discovery of America Director Tony Stone Screenwriter Tony Stone Distributor Magnet Releasing Running Time 107 minutes Screen Count 1 Talent in red has entry in The Big Picture